Today was my first in a new series of Brown Bag Lunches with the offices of Dr Cesar Lara. My topic (as the title above says) is The Benefits of Gratitude. I explain how being grateful affects our body, our mind, even our career! Then I offer ways that you can increase gratitude in your life.
DebbieDona
When Nostalgia Turns into Noise
Watching The Sound of Music Live! completely captivated me. Immediately, the performance carried me back to childhood — to Julie Andrews as Fraulein Maria, to singing in the woods near my home, and to imagining I belonged to the Von Trapp family. It felt magical then, and once again, it felt magical now.
However, after I opened social media, the tone shifted.
Within minutes, celebration turned into criticism. Instead of simply enjoying the performance, people began dissecting it. Soon, comment sections filled with sharp opinions, comparisons, and rebuttals. As a result, what began as joy quickly felt heavier.
That shift caught my attention.
The Cost of Constant Critique
At one time, being a professional critic seemed glamorous. After all, who wouldn’t enjoy attending Broadway shows, previewing films, or dining at fine restaurants for a living?
In reality, though, critics do far more than enjoy experiences. Rather than absorb the moment, they analyze every detail and evaluate every nuance. Ultimately, they search for flaws.
Over time, that focus shapes perception.
When we train our minds to look for what is wrong, we inevitably find it — even in something beautiful.
Why We Gravitate Toward the Negative
Naturally, the brain scans for problems. Originally, that instinct protected us. Today, however, constant exposure to negativity — through news cycles, online commentary, and everyday conversation — reinforces that pattern.
Each day, headlines highlight economic strain and political conflict. Meanwhile, people I care about face health challenges, relationship stress, and personal uncertainty. In contrast, music, art, literature, and even a shared meal offer relief.
They create space to breathe.
Yet when criticism invades even those spaces, it drains that relief and redirects attention back to what feels broken.
Choosing Gratitude Instead
Of course, criticism has its place. Nevertheless, I feel grateful that it is not my role to search for flaws.
Instead, I consciously choose to direct my attention toward what works.
In my own life, I practice appreciation and gratitude intentionally. As I strengthen that habit, I notice that resilience grows. Consequently, that shift in attention not only steadies me personally but also allows me to bring calm, grounded presence to my clients.
Attention is powerful.
Both criticism and gratitude expand with practice.
Personally, I know which one I want to cultivate.
Thanksgiving commemorates a harvest festival celebrated by the Pilgrims in 1621, and is held in the US on the fourth Thursday in November. It is a day set aside to give thanks for the bounty of the previous year, although it often ends up with feasting, football and now even shopping for the upcoming holidays. Hence, we have one day a year to express our gratitude, between these other activities. Yet, is one day a year, during commercial breaks really enough?
Research has found that grateful people are more likely to:
-Take better care of themselves physically and mentally
-Engage in more protective health behaviors and maintenance
-Get more regular exercise
-Eat a healthier diet
-Have improved mental alertness
-Schedule regular physical examinations with their doctor
-Cope better with stress and daily challenges
-Feel happier and more optimistic
-Avoid problematic physical symptoms
-Have stronger immune systems
-Maintain a brighter view of life
So, perhaps a daily flexing of the gratitude muscle is in order. I call it a muscle to show you that gratitude is not just a feeling, if it was, we would feel it all the time. Gratitude is the combination of being gracious and one’s attitude. I want all the benefits listed above, so I decided to start daily rituals of gratitude. Daily reminders of what is right in my life as opposed to running the constant treadmill of more, more more!
Here are simple ways you can join me in this practice.
Good Morning and Thank You! Before you even get out of bed, take 2 minutes to reflect on whoever or whatever you are grateful for. Just a silent thank you will set the tone of your day to come.
Say Thank You. Whenever someone does something nice, say thank you. Mean it. No matter how small, recognize the kindnesses in your life.
Write a handwritten note of thanks. How many handwritten notes have you gotten lately. If you are like most people, not many. Texting and email has replaced the art of the written note. Yet, just send out one note a day and see how good you feel. It doesn’t have to be long or fancy, after all it is the thought that counts. (Especially for you!) It can even be a note of thanks left on the desk of a co-worker or written on a bill along with the payment.
List 3 reason for gratitude at the end of your day. Keeping a gratitude journal is easy when it is only 3 reasons at the end of the day. On the days you feel less than grateful, you have your journal as a reminder of the good things in your life.
As always, feel free to drop by my website to listen to a free audio.
Please, leave anything you do to enhance your attitude of gracious receiving in the comments below.
“Your body is precious. It is our vehicle for awakening. Treat it with care.” ~ Buddha
Are You Eating on Autopilot?
Do you eat too fast and rarely feel satisfied with your food? Are you like so many people, so busy and rushed throughout your day that you tend to grab a quick bite? Do you eat at your desk while working? Perhaps you find yourself eating in front of the television or while on your computer?
In a world of fast food drive-throughs, we have become accustomed to eating out of bags and cartons, without thought.
Why Mindful Eating Matters
Mealtime can be a time of communion and appreciation. Appreciation for the bounty of foods available to us, as well as for the hands that prepare it, is only part of being a mindful eater.
By eating consciously, we take time to savor flavors, colors, textures, and smells. In other words, we truly enjoy meals by slowing down. This awareness can even support the release of excess weight.
The Impact of Stress on Digestion
Mindful eating may seem simple — choose your food, prepare it, and enjoy it. However, if you become aware of your thoughts while eating, you might be surprised at how little of your consciousness is actually present.
Research shows that eating while experiencing stress disrupts digestion. In the short term, this leads to poor nutrient absorption. Over time, chronic stress while eating may contribute to irritable bowel syndrome, ulcers, weight gain, and eating disorders.
By becoming mindful eaters, we create a healthier relationship with food and with ourselves. When we pay attention to what we consume, we also become more aware of the messages our body sends us.
A Simple Mindful Eating Exercise
Here is an exercise to help you experience a mindful moment with food:
Take one grape and place it in your mouth. Close your eyes and notice the size, shape, and feeling of the grape. Roll it gently with your tongue and explore its texture.
With your eyes still closed, imagine you can see it clearly in your mouth. Make the color rich and vivid in your mind.
Now bite into it slowly. Notice the juice. Extract every drop you can. Observe the texture inside and how it differs from when it was whole.
Chew slowly. Extend the experience for as long as possible — perhaps even five minutes.
That grape may be the best grape you ever eat.
5 Quick Tips for Becoming a Mindful Eater
1. Never Eat Distracted
Turn off the television, computer, and phones when you eat.
2. Engage Your Senses
Eating is a multisensory experience. Appreciate the appearance, taste, texture, and aroma of your food.
3. Keep Mealtime Peaceful
Declare mealtime a space for pleasant conversation only. Eating with family and friends is a communion of souls. Keep it stress free.
4. Notice Without Judgment
There will be foods you like, dislike, or feel neutral about. Simply notice your reactions without labeling them right or wrong.
5. Listen to Your Body
Your body sends signals when it feels nourished. A helpful affirmation is:
“I eat to nourish my body, not feed my emotions.”
Make Mindful Eating a Way of Life
Practice mindful eating consistently, and it will naturally become part of who you are.
Why Do We Sometimes Celebrate Fear?
Did you know that Walt Disney reportedly had a surprising fear?
Keep reading — it might change how you think about your own.
Halloween is one of the few times each year when we intentionally celebrate fear. We build haunted houses, tell ghost stories, and watch zombie movies. For many people, that controlled rush of adrenaline feels thrilling.
In fact, some individuals even chase that sensation repeatedly.
However, what about the people who don’t enjoy fear at all? What about those who feel consumed by it?
That kind of fear is different.
When Fear Helps — And When It Hurts
Fear can serve an important purpose. If a hungry tiger stands nearby, fear activates the fight-or-flight response and prepares the body to survive. In that situation, fear protects you.
Yet most modern fears are not life-or-death threats.
Instead, they involve flying, public speaking, medical procedures, driving, or social situations. Although these fears feel intense, they rarely signal true danger.
Over time, unmanaged fear can begin to limit life. When fear becomes persistent and overwhelming, it may develop into a phobia. At that point, willpower alone often isn’t enough.
That’s when professional support — including tools such as hypnosis — can help retrain the mind and calm the nervous system.
Practical Steps for Overcoming Fear
While deeper phobias may require professional guidance, many fears respond well to simple awareness practices.
1. Cultivate Awareness
First, acknowledge that fear limits your enjoyment of life. Many people become so accustomed to anxious thoughts that they stop noticing how much control fear has taken.
2. Identify the Specific Fear
Next, clarify what you’re actually afraid of. What images appear in your mind? What story plays out in those mental scenes? Often, fear grows stronger when left undefined.
3. Become Curious
Rather than fighting the fear immediately, observe it. Where do you feel it in your body? What thoughts fuel it? How do you react when it appears?
Curiosity reduces intensity.
4. Use Your Breath
Then, slow your breathing. Inhale calm. Exhale tension. As you breathe, imagine the fear shrinking or even turning into a cartoon version of itself. Visualization shifts emotional charge.
5. Change the Emotional Tone
You might even print or draw an image that represents your fear. Humor can reduce power. When you treat fear as something smaller than you, your nervous system begins to recalibrate.
6. Imagine Life Without the Fear
Finally, picture yourself free from it. How would you stand? Speak? Move? Think? Practicing that version of yourself builds new neural pathways.
Walt Disney’s Surprising Phobia
Reports suggest that Walt Disney struggled with musophobia — a fear of mice.
Ironically, he went on to create Mickey Mouse, Minnie Mouse, and an entire entertainment empire built around animated mice.
Whether or not that creative act consciously addressed his fear, the symbolism is powerful. By transforming something frightening into something playful, he shifted its meaning.
He turned fear into imagination.
When Fear Becomes a Phobia
If your fear has crossed into phobia territory, you already know it isn’t logical. You may understand intellectually that you are safe, yet your body reacts as if danger is imminent.
At that stage, professional help can make a meaningful difference.
Hypnosis, in particular, helps rewire fear responses by working directly with the subconscious patterns that fuel them. Rather than forcing yourself to “be brave,” hypnosis can help you feel naturally calmer and more confident.
Releasing Fear and Living Fully
Franklin Delano Roosevelt famously said,
“The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.”
Perhaps it’s time to release fear and reclaim your sense of freedom.
You don’t have to remain controlled by it.
Fear can warn you — but it does not have to rule you.
Let Go of Regret: Watch the Present and Create Your Future
“Forget the past, watch the present, and create the future.”
It sounds simple.
Yet for many people, regret quietly shapes daily thoughts, emotions, and decisions.
We all have moments we wish we could undo. Words we wish we hadn’t spoken. Opportunities we wish we had taken. Paths we wish we had chosen differently.
But living in regret keeps you anchored to a version of yourself that no longer exists.
If you truly want to create your future, you must first learn how to let go of regret.
Why Regret Keeps You Stuck
Regret often disguises itself as reflection.
But there is a difference between learning from the past and living in it.
When you replay old mistakes repeatedly, your nervous system responds as if the event is happening again. Stress hormones rise. Self-doubt increases. Confidence shrinks.
You begin to define yourself by what went wrong instead of what is possible.
And that makes it difficult to move forward.
3 Quick Tips to Let Go of Regret
1. Separate the Lesson From the Shame
There is always a lesson.
Ask yourself:
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What did this teach me?
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How am I wiser today because of it?
Keep the lesson. Release the self-punishment.
Growth requires reflection. Healing requires compassion.
2. Anchor Yourself in the Present
The present moment is the only place where change can occur.
Instead of asking, “Why did I do that?”
Try asking, “What can I do now?”
That subtle shift moves you from rumination to action.
Even one small forward step interrupts the regret cycle.
3. Decide Who You Are Becoming
Regret focuses on who you were.
Power focuses on who you are becoming.
Close your eyes and imagine your future self:
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Calm
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Confident
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Grounded
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At peace with the past
Begin making decisions today that align with that version of you.
That is how you create the future.
You Are Not Your Worst Moment
Every human being has chapters they would edit if they could.
But your story is still being written.
Let go of regret not because the past didn’t matter —
but because your future does.
Watch the Video
I’ve attached a short video below where I share more insight into releasing regret and stepping into the present moment:
Slow Down — Don’t Move So Fast
Learning to slow down has become one of the greatest challenges of modern life. As Simon and Garfunkel once sang, many of us move too fast to truly enjoy where we are.
The desire to slow down is not new. For as long as humanity has existed, people have searched for ways to live with more ease and less pressure. Ironically, the more time-saving technology we create, the busier we become.
Today, many people watch television while scrolling online. Others walk down the street talking on the phone. Music plays while we drive, and messages are checked at stoplights.
We are always doing something.
The Hidden Cost of Constant Busyness
Modern work life adds another layer of pressure. Economic concerns and productivity expectations push many people to use every waking moment trying to accomplish more.
According to the American Psychological Association, workplace stress affects millions of Americans each year.
However, workplace stress is not uncommon, and how we deal with it can have a significant impact. Chronic stress affects both mental and physical health and carries significant costs for individuals and businesses alike.
Perhaps Simon and Garfunkel were right.
It is a conscious choice to slow down. It isn’t always easy, but it leads to deeper appreciation, better health, and greater happiness.
7 Simple Ways to Slow Down and Reduce Stress
1. Do Less
It is difficult to slow down when you are trying to do everything.
Ask yourself:
Is this truly necessary?
Focus on what matters most and let go of the rest. Build space between tasks and appointments so you can move through your day with intention instead of urgency.
2. Be Present
Slowing down requires more than moving slowly — it requires awareness.
When your mind drifts into the past or worries about the future, gently return to the present moment.
Notice how our pets live. They are not worried about tomorrow’s meal; they simply want to share this moment with you.
Observe your surroundings. Notice your actions. Fully experience now.
Presence takes practice — and it is profoundly worthwhile.
3. Disconnect
If you carry a smartphone everywhere, experiment with turning it off occasionally — or leaving it behind.
Constant availability creates constant interruption. When we disconnect from devices, we reconnect with ourselves.
Even short breaks from technology can dramatically reduce stress levels.
4. Appreciate Nature
Many of us move between home, car, and office without truly experiencing the outdoors.
Step outside intentionally.
Feel fresh air. Notice water, greenery, sunlight, and wind. Walk, swim, kayak, or simply sit quietly in nature.
Even a few minutes outdoors each day can reset the nervous system.
5. Eat Slowly
Rushing meals disconnects us from nourishment and often leads to overeating.
Before eating, take three deep breaths.
Notice flavors, textures, and aromas. Eating slowly helps you feel satisfied sooner — and enjoy your food more deeply.
6. Allow Yourself to Daydream
Daydreaming is often misunderstood as unproductive, yet research shows it enhances creativity.
When stress decreases, the brain accesses deeper problem-solving and imaginative pathways.
Close your door. Turn off electronics. Sit quietly for five to ten minutes and let your mind wander.
Your next insight may arrive when you finally pause.
7. Breathe
When life speeds up, pause.
Take a slow, deep breath.
Then another.
Feel the air entering your body and stress leaving with each exhale.
Notice how babies — and animals — breathe naturally through the diaphragm, their bellies gently rising and falling.
Return to that natural rhythm whenever you need to slow yourself down.
Slowing Down Is a Choice
Life rarely slows itself.
We must choose it.
And when we do, we often rediscover something simple and profound:
Peace was never missing — only our attention was.
If you want to take a moment right now to slow down and relax, visit my website here for the free audio: Serenity
A calm sunrise scene near water representing mindfulness, relaxation, and the intentional choice to slow down and reconnect with the present moment.
This story about the Golden Buddha is not original, yet it remains worth sharing.
In 1957, Tibetan monks received notice that a new highway would cut directly through the land where they cared for a shrine. That shrine held a massive clay Buddha, and the monks needed to move it. They prepared the statue for transport beneath its protective roof, and on the scheduled day, a crane began lifting it from its base.
As the statue rose, deep cracks appeared. The figure weighed far more than engineers had estimated. The supervising monk immediately shouted for the crane operator to stop and lower it. The operator acted quickly and carefully set the statue back on the ground. When the monks and engineers examined it, they saw several large fractures. They determined that a larger crane would be required, but it would not arrive until the following day.
Meanwhile, a storm approached. The monks covered the statue with waterproof tarps supported by poles and settled in for the night.
Later that evening, the head monk awoke with a strong urge to check on the statue. He walked outside with a flashlight and examined the cracks. When he shone the light into one opening, something reflected back at him. Curious and unsettled, he retrieved a hammer and chisel and carefully chipped away at the clay. What he uncovered stunned him. He woke the other monks and instructed them to bring tools. Working by lantern light, they removed the clay layer piece by piece. By morning, they stood before a solid gold Buddha.
When the moving crew returned, confusion spread. The clay statue had vanished. In its place stood gold. Historians later confirmed that monks centuries earlier had concealed the statue beneath clay to protect it from invading armies. The invaders ignored it—and killed the monks—leaving the treasure hidden until 1957.
Each of us carries a Golden Buddha within. Life layers us with fear, survival habits, and self-doubt until we forget what lies beneath. This story offers three tools: the flashlight of awareness, the chisel of responsibility, and the hammer of supportive relationships. With these, we can uncover who we truly are.
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Tampa made a top 10 list, in fact it made it to the number one spot! But, not a list we like to brag about around here.
Sperling’s BestPlaces, a research firm specializing in livability rankings, has released its new study of major cities with the most and least stress. The study analyzed a variety of factors associated with stress, including suicide, divorce, crime, joblessness and lengthy commuting.
With that in mind, I decided to do my part to help reduce the stress. It may not be the cure, but if it even helps change one attitude, I believe the butterfly effect may begin. Be sure you have a few minutes to enjoy, uninterrupted. Then please, share with anyone you might know that could use a moment of comfort. |
