fear

Move Beyond Fear

Written by: Debbie

“Whenever we take a chance and enter unfamiliar territory or put ourselves into the world in a new way, we experience fear. Very often this fear keeps us from moving ahead with our lives.” Susan Jeffers, Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway.

We all encounter the feeling of fear at one time or another. Whether it is a fear of loss, rejection, public speaking, failure, the list goes on and on. Fear creates a biological response in our bodies known as the Flight or Fight Response. At times of true danger, such as an angry bear charging at us, that response can come in handy. Realistically, in most of our lives, those experiences are few and far between. Our challenges are more of an emotional nature. Still, we have those feelings when we dwell on our challenges.

“No matter what degree of insecurity you are feeling, a part of you knows there is a lot of wonderful “stuff” within you just waiting to be let out, and NOW is the perfect time for opening the door to the power and love within.” Susan Jeffers

The good news is that emotional pain can’t kill you and that’s why doing something you know you need to do, even if it’s scary, can be the most important tool to overcoming fear. Most of the time, once you’ve actually done something scary for the first time, you find it really wasn’t that scary at all and the fear goes away.

Two cigarettes with a warning: Don't think about smoking.

Practicing Gratitude for Happiness: Why “First World Problems” Still Matter

Written by: Debbie

More and more, I see the hashtag #FirstWorldProblems used as a humorous commentary on modern life. It’s often meant to remind us that those of us living in Western societies have it relatively easy.

Examples abound:

A possible infection, another root canal, and the removal of two wisdom teeth — shaping up to be a fabulous summer. #FirstWorldProblems
I received new honors from my college, so now all my printed resumes are useless. #FirstWorldProblems

Worrying about which job offer to take may seem trivial compared to someone wondering whether they will survive another week or feed their family. And yet, perspective alone doesn’t always relieve suffering.

Why Comparing Pain Doesn’t Help

When we face real hardship, we often wonder how we ever got so worked up about what once felt like major problems. In hindsight, it can seem like wasted worry — time that could have been spent enjoying life.

However, when someone responds to our distress with “there are people who have it much worse than you,” it often feels dismissive rather than comforting. Many of us remember being told as children to be grateful for food we disliked because children elsewhere were starving. That didn’t inspire gratitude — it inspired guilt.

I once heard a therapist tell a client that because people in war-torn countries have “real problems,” she should be grateful that her husband leaving her with small children was all she had to face. Rather than comfort, that likely left the client feeling guilty, terrified, hurt, and unseen.

Awareness of global suffering doesn’t invalidate personal pain — because we live our lives where we are.

Fear Is Fear — Regardless of Circumstances

Fear, anxiety, and hopelessness do correlate with life circumstances — but only up to a point. Living in a safe environment increases feelings of security, but the relationship isn’t exact.

Fear is fear.

Whether someone is afraid of starvation or afraid of riding an elevator to work, the nervous system reacts the same way. A person living in an outwardly secure environment can still feel deeply unsafe inside.

Research supports this. Studies show that only about 10% of our happiness comes from external circumstances. The remaining 90% is shaped by our inner environment — our thoughts, interpretations, habits, and emotional patterns.

The Case for Practicing Gratitude

This is where practicing gratitude for happiness becomes meaningful — not as a way to dismiss pain, but as a way to shift inner awareness.

Across history, philosophers, spiritual teachers, and religious traditions have emphasized gratitude. Research now confirms what they intuited:

People who practice gratitude regularly experience:

Increased optimism, enthusiasm, and energy
Lower levels of depression
Improved immune function
Better sleep and more exercise
Greater progress toward personal goals
Stronger feelings of being loved and respected

Gratitude isn’t denial — it’s attention training.

Gratitude Without Comparison

Rather than focusing on how others have it worse, it’s more effective to consciously notice what you have.

Gratitude works best when it is non-comparative. Comparing yourself upward (she got the promotion and I didn’t) breeds resentment. Comparing yourself downward (others have it worse) breeds guilt.

Instead, focus on your own blessings.

A Simple Gratitude Practice That Actually Helps

The next time you feel worried or discouraged, try this:

Think of three ways your situation could be worse for you — but isn’t.
- This hurts, but I do have other friends.
- This is stressful, but my kids are safe.
- This didn’t work out, but I still have meaningful work.
Then, briefly imagine your life without those blessings.
Picture what it might feel like if they were gone — just long enough to feel the contrast.
Important:
- Choose blessings you genuinely appreciate
- Do not focus on fears that are currently active or likely
- Avoid scenarios that could intensify anxiety
Return your focus to gratitude.
Let yourself feel appreciation — and yes, even relief.

Add a smile. Even a forced one helps. It’s surprisingly difficult to feel miserable while smiling.

As Gene Wilder said in Young Frankenstein:
“It could be worse. It could be raining.”

Sunset with stress-relief quote overlay.

Simple Stress Release Exercise You Can Do Anywhere

Written by: Debbie

How would you like a simple stress release exercise that helps calm anxious feelings — one that’s easy, effective, and even a little fun?

Imagine being able to release stress wherever you are: at home, in your car, or at the office. No equipment. No special preparation. Just a quick mind-body reset when you need it most.

Research on mind-body techniques shows that simple physical actions combined with focused imagination can help relieve stress and anxiety by calming the nervous system. This exercise is designed to do exactly that.

Step One: Acknowledge the Feeling

Begin by noticing what you’re feeling. Anxiety, nervousness, fear, or even panic — simply acknowledge it without judging yourself.

Allow the feeling to be present. Remember, it is just a feeling, and feelings themselves cannot harm you.

Step Two: Contain the Stress

Now, close your left hand (the hand you write with) into a fist. Make it tight. Really squeeze and feel the pressure.

As you do this, imagine all of your anxious feelings slowly flowing down your arm and into your clenched fist.

If it helps, visualize the anxiety as a red, glowing energy traveling down your arm and becoming trapped in your fist. Make the image as real as possible. You may notice sensations such as pulsing, warmth, or pressure — this is normal.

Step Three: Transform the Energy

As the energy gathers in your fist, begin to notice a shift. The anxiety may soften into a manageable nervous excitement.

You might imagine the color changing — from red to pink, or even to a calming blue. Let the sensations evolve naturally.

Step Four: Release and Let Go

Now for the final step.

Slowly begin to open your fist, one finger at a time, counting from 5 down to 1. Take a gentle breath with each finger as it opens.

As your hand opens fully, notice the tension releasing. The trapped anxiety is being set free.

With one final deep breath, blow gently onto the palm of your hand, sending the stress, fear, and tension away.

Step Five: Notice the Release

Take a moment to notice how you feel. You may experience a light sense of relief or calm.

You can imagine the remaining anxiety floating up, up, and away — carried off into the sky and out of your awareness.

Repeat this simple stress release exercise up to three times, and notice how much better you feel.

Extra Support for Stress Relief

If you’d like additional guidance, you can also tune into a free stress-relief audio here: Serenity.

Woman applying hand sanitizer with a spray bottle.

Overcoming Fear and Anxiety: Losing Snakes on St. Patrick’s Day

Written by: Debbie

Overcoming fear and anxiety is something many of us struggle with, often without realizing how much it quietly shapes our thoughts, decisions, and sense of inner peace.

St. Patrick’s Day is here and celebrations are in full swing — from turning rivers green (famously in Chicago and even locally the Hillsborough River) to parades and parties. According to tradition, St. Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland. However, historians agree Ireland never had snakes. In biblical symbolism, snakes represented evil, and Pagans were often viewed the same by early Christians. The story is now widely understood as a metaphor — not for reptiles, but for beliefs, fears, and influences that were driven away or transformed.

I like to use this metaphor in a very different way.

I’m not in any rush to drive Pagans — or any other group of people — out of my life. But anything that stands in the way of inner peace? That can leave.

Fear as an Inner Snake

Ironically, I once had a horrid fear of snakes myself. Through self-hypnosis and gradual exposure, I was able to release that fear entirely. That experience taught me something important: fear is learned — and what is learned can be unlearned.

So what are the “snakes” that most of us are actually dealing with?

Fear tops the list.

Fear can rob us of inner peace almost instantly, the moment it becomes a thought. Anxiety, fear-based thinking, and avoidance often work together in subtle but powerful ways.

How Anxiety and Avoidance Work Together

We all have a continuous inner voice. When we are anxious or fearful, that voice can become loud, repetitive, and relentless. This self-talk directly affects our emotions and behaviors. When we start telling ourselves things that don’t line up with reality, anxiety grows.

Often, our first instinct when fear appears is avoidance. When danger is real, avoidance can be appropriate. But when fear is irrational, avoidance only strengthens anxiety.

Avoidance “works” in the short term — we feel immediate relief. Unfortunately, that relief trains the brain to believe avoidance is the solution. Over time, fear begins to control larger and larger portions of our lives. Avoidance never makes fear go away; it teaches fear where our boundaries are.

This is why overcoming fear and anxiety requires awareness, not escape.

Reframing Fear to Restore Inner Peace

Many people naturally focus on the negative side of any challenging situation. When we focus on what could go wrong, we resist taking action and become stuck. The more we focus on loss, the more anxiety we create.

A powerful way to begin reframing fear is to bring it into the open.

Start by writing down your fears. In each situation that leaves you hesitant or anxious, ask yourself:

What am I afraid will happen?
How likely is that outcome, really?
If I take this fear to its extreme, what are the actual odds?

Then, on a separate sheet of paper, list the benefits of moving forward. Be specific. Fear amplifies negatives and minimizes positives, so you may need to consciously emphasize what could go right.

When you compare these two lists, fear loses its grip — and balance returns.

A Real-Life Example of Overcoming Fear and Anxiety

Recently, I worked with a woman experiencing frequent anxiety attacks. The onset of her anxiety coincided with starting a job search. As we talked, her fears surfaced clearly.

When we explored those fears fully, she realized she was unlikely to end up homeless or alone on the streets of Tampa Bay — the scenario her anxiety had quietly been suggesting.

As we reframed the situation and explored what could go right, her anxiety began to dissipate. She chose to move forward with her job search instead of letting fear dictate her choices.

Her snakes were driven away.

Channeling Your Inner St. Patrick

Take a moment today to channel your inner St. Patrick. Ask yourself:

What fears have been lingering too long?
Where has avoidance quietly been making decisions for you?
What inner snakes are ready to leave?

Breathe in calm. Picture the rolling green hills of Ireland. Imagine fear loosening its grip as clarity returns. Then ask yourself what beauty might be waiting for you on the other side of courage.

Overcoming fear and anxiety isn’t about forcing positivity — it’s about seeing clearly.

And sometimes, that’s all it takes to restore inner peace.

Happy Halloween!

Written by: Debbie

Walt Disney’s Secret Fear (And What It Teaches Us About Overcoming Phobias)

Written by: Debbie

Why Do We Sometimes Celebrate Fear?

Did you know that Walt Disney reportedly had a surprising fear?

Keep reading — it might change how you think about your own.

Halloween is one of the few times each year when we intentionally celebrate fear. We build haunted houses, tell ghost stories, and watch zombie movies. For many people, that controlled rush of adrenaline feels thrilling.

In fact, some individuals even chase that sensation repeatedly.

However, what about the people who don’t enjoy fear at all? What about those who feel consumed by it?

That kind of fear is different.

When Fear Helps — And When It Hurts

Fear can serve an important purpose. If a hungry tiger stands nearby, fear activates the fight-or-flight response and prepares the body to survive. In that situation, fear protects you.

Yet most modern fears are not life-or-death threats.

Instead, they involve flying, public speaking, medical procedures, driving, or social situations. Although these fears feel intense, they rarely signal true danger.

Over time, unmanaged fear can begin to limit life. When fear becomes persistent and overwhelming, it may develop into a phobia. At that point, willpower alone often isn’t enough.

That’s when professional support — including tools such as hypnosis — can help retrain the mind and calm the nervous system.

Practical Steps for Overcoming Fear

While deeper phobias may require professional guidance, many fears respond well to simple awareness practices.

1. Cultivate Awareness

First, acknowledge that fear limits your enjoyment of life. Many people become so accustomed to anxious thoughts that they stop noticing how much control fear has taken.

2. Identify the Specific Fear

Next, clarify what you’re actually afraid of. What images appear in your mind? What story plays out in those mental scenes? Often, fear grows stronger when left undefined.

3. Become Curious

Rather than fighting the fear immediately, observe it. Where do you feel it in your body? What thoughts fuel it? How do you react when it appears?

Curiosity reduces intensity.

4. Use Your Breath

Then, slow your breathing. Inhale calm. Exhale tension. As you breathe, imagine the fear shrinking or even turning into a cartoon version of itself. Visualization shifts emotional charge.

5. Change the Emotional Tone

You might even print or draw an image that represents your fear. Humor can reduce power. When you treat fear as something smaller than you, your nervous system begins to recalibrate.

6. Imagine Life Without the Fear

Finally, picture yourself free from it. How would you stand? Speak? Move? Think? Practicing that version of yourself builds new neural pathways.

Walt Disney’s Surprising Phobia

Reports suggest that Walt Disney struggled with musophobia — a fear of mice.

Ironically, he went on to create Mickey Mouse, Minnie Mouse, and an entire entertainment empire built around animated mice.

Whether or not that creative act consciously addressed his fear, the symbolism is powerful. By transforming something frightening into something playful, he shifted its meaning.

He turned fear into imagination.

When Fear Becomes a Phobia

If your fear has crossed into phobia territory, you already know it isn’t logical. You may understand intellectually that you are safe, yet your body reacts as if danger is imminent.

At that stage, professional help can make a meaningful difference.

Hypnosis, in particular, helps rewire fear responses by working directly with the subconscious patterns that fuel them. Rather than forcing yourself to “be brave,” hypnosis can help you feel naturally calmer and more confident.

Releasing Fear and Living Fully

Franklin Delano Roosevelt famously said,

“The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.”

Perhaps it’s time to release fear and reclaim your sense of freedom.

You don’t have to remain controlled by it.

Fear can warn you — but it does not have to rule you.

Debbie Lane speaking to working women of tampa bay

No Strings Attached, Your Fears Untangled

Written by: Debbie

Fear often arrives quietly — not as danger, but as hesitation, self-doubt, or the feeling of being stuck.

During my presentation at the Working Women of Florida Conference, I spoke about how fear can be gently unraveled rather than fought. This hypnosis experience was recorded to help listeners begin releasing fear safely and naturally.

👉 If you would like to read more about the conference and the principles behind this work, visit:
Overcoming Fear: The 5 A’s to Move Beyond Fear and Take Action

Take a few moments, get comfortable, and allow yourself to simply listen.

This free hypnosis recording helps release fear patterns and emotional tension using gentle clinical hypnosis techniques. Ideal for anxiety, confidence building, and overcoming limiting beliefs.

How This Hypnosis Helps Untangle Fear

Fear is rarely about the situation itself.
It is often connected to past experiences, expectations, or protective patterns created by the subconscious mind.

Hypnosis allows the mind to:

release outdated fear responses
create emotional safety
reconnect with confidence and clarity

If fear is limiting your life, professional hypnosis can help you move forward safely and comfortably.

Schedule a session at WisdomHypnosis.com

Audience watching speaker, Debbie Lane of Wisdom Hypnosis on stage in theater.

Overcoming Fear: The 5 A’s to Move Beyond Fear and Take Action

Written by: Debbie

I recently had the honor of speaking at the Working Women of Florida conference held at the Mahaffey Theater. Standing on stage before more than 400 women and discussing overcoming fear was both humbling and inspiring. The conference was held in St. Petersburg, Florida, serving women from across Pinellas County, Clearwater, Palm Harbor, Dunedin, and Tampa Bay.

The energy, encouragement, and connection shared during those two days reminded me why helping people move beyond fear is work I deeply love.

During the presentation, I introduced what I call The 5 A’s of Overcoming Fear — simple but powerful principles that help transform fear into forward movement.

The 5 A’s of Overcoming Fear

1. Acknowledge

The first step in overcoming fear is acknowledgment.

Ask yourself:
What does this fear truly represent?

Often fear is symbolic rather than literal. For example, I once believed I had a fear of driving. In reality, the fear was connected to success and the life changes success might bring.

Once the true fear was acknowledged, moving forward became possible.

2. Awfulize

This may sound unusual, but intentionally imagining the worst-case scenario can reduce fear’s power.

When you “awfulize” a situation, you often discover:

The outcome is not as catastrophic as imagined, or
You already possess the skills needed to cope.

Fear loses intensity when examined realistically.

3. Appreciate

Fear once served a purpose.

At some point, it protected you, comforted you, or helped you survive a difficult situation. Appreciating its past role allows you to release it without judgment.

Just as childhood habits eventually fall away, outdated fears and limiting beliefs can be outgrown.

4. Ask (Afform)

The questions we ask ourselves shape our emotional experience.

Instead of asking:
“What if this goes wrong?”

Try asking:
“What if this goes right?”

This approach aligns with the concept of Afformations, developed by Noah St. John, which focuses on empowering questions that guide the mind toward solutions and possibility.

5. Act

True overcoming of fear happens through action.

Understanding is important — but experience creates transformation.

Deciding you are no longer afraid of elevators is one thing. Riding in one is the victory.

Take small steps. Find supportive people. Celebrate progress.

Action turns insight into confidence.

Creating a Life Beyond Fear

Overcoming fear is not about eliminating fear completely. Instead, it is about learning to move forward even when fear appears.

Today is a perfect day to begin creating the life you desire — one step, one choice, and one courageous action at a time.

I would love to hear your stories of courage and growth. Please share your successes in the comments so others may be inspired as well.

TRUST

Written by: Debbie

So many people are living in fear currently.

FEAR = False Evidence Appearing Real.

It is time we refocus ourselves, paying attention to trust. I have created an acronym for trust that I think will help.

TRUST = Totally Releasing Unnecessary Scary Thoughts.

In this moment, are you safe? If so, then that is where you focus, because all any of us have is this moment. Recall or imagine a safe place. Notice the colors, the textures, the designs of this place. Notice the temperature, the aromas and the sweet sounds of serenity and calm. Allow this place to become real. Notice how in this place, in this moment, you are safe and secure and serene.

Notice how the body feels when this is your truth. Allow your mind to wander to a concern and wonder how it might be if that concern were behind you. How would you feel if you were free of that worry, if you had a solution to that puzzle?

I wonder if the waiting for the other shoe to drop is more what creates discomfort within you than the reality of the situation. All too often, after a “crisis” is over we realize that fear was in our heads, not our circumstances.

Allow your mind to drift past the event you have been concerned about and notice the outcome. What steps might you have taken to get to the desired outcome? What are the keys to your success?

Perhaps it starts with T.R.U.S.T.

Person with black cat on shoulder indoors.

A Lucky Black Cat

Written by: Debbie

Superstitions centering around the black cat are some of the most well-known and popular superstitions today. Depending upon where you live, the luck centered around the cat can be good luck or bad luck. Here in the States, a black cat crossing your path is considered by many to be bad luck.

Well, I am the not so proud owner of a black cat. Not so proud has nothing to do with any superstition or concern about my luck. She has crossed my path too many times to count. The only time it has been bad luck is when I have had the misfortune to not see her as I was stepping in that direction and end up tripping or falling. (I never promised to be graceful!) I am not so proud because this cat has it out for me!

She is the true pet of my oldest son. He named her Sassy and they have been devoted to one another since the day I reluctantly agreed to yet another pet in our household. My son named her Sassy, after a cat in a movie that was popular at the time, “Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey”. (Even as I went to type that name it became Homeward Pound, do you suppose that was Freudian?)

If my son is in the room and simply wags his finger, the cat runs to jump on his lap and purrs like a kitten. (Mind you she is 17 years old!) She sleeps on his bed when he is home, she sits in his window often when he is gone. Sassy is in love with my son. She will go to my youngest, when the oldest is missing for comfort. She even has a game with my husband, “Pet Daddy”. He sits on the couch, she at his side and when he says, “pet Daddy”, she reaches her little paw out to rub his tummy.

I clean her cat box. I feed her. I grow catnip for her. I buy her toys. I disgust this cat! She looks the opposite direction of wherever I may be. She sits on my papers, if I am working in the living room, then becomes annoyed with me if I reach out for one. She yowls at me in the morning when she wants to be fed.

I tried to convince my son to take her with him, so he wouldn’t be homesick when he left for college. He didn’t want her to get out if a roommate wasn’t aware in a new town. She mourned his moving, lost weight. I took her to the vets and bought a special weight improving food for her. Still, I disgust her.

I had a relative who was afraid of cats. A black cat crossing her path would send her into such strong fear, she would freeze and you could see her heart palpitate. She didn’t like pictures of cats, seeing any cat outside upset her. Now, that is more than a little superstition, that is fear! In a case like that, through hypnosis one can regress to the origin of such a fear and learn to overcome it. This relative also feared hypnosis, she didn’t understand it. What a shame, to live a life of fear.

For me, I just live a life of servitude to a Lucky Black Cat!

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