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May, A Month For Mental Health Improvements

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mental healthMay is Revise Your Work Schedule Month, National Mental Health Month and National Meditation Month. That seems telling; people are tired, over-worked, and stressed! The boss gives another assignment and there goes your evening. Maybe you are the boss and it is a demanding client that prevails upon your time. Perhaps it is the kids hectic after school activity schedule that keeps you running It is easy to forget to take care of ourselves.

Revise Your Work Schedule

I love the concept of revising your work schedule. After all, who doesn’t want a better work life balance? Whether that involves telecommuting a few days a week, tweaking your schedule or job sharing, in a perfect world those things can happen. Not everyone lives in a perfect world. So what are some things you can do to make your day more productive?

  1. Clean off your desk…make files not piles. The average worker wastes 2 hours per day re-handling and looking for things. Keep that in mind at home as well, go through your mail while standing at the trash can (or recycle bin) and immediately throw out the junk mail you don’t want.
  2. Make a plan. Prioritize! Recently a client of mine made the decision that she would do monthly birthday celebrations in her office with one big cake instead of the individual cakes and parties she used to give. The company has grown and so have her responsibilities. I encouraged her to take this a step further and delegate!
  3. Keep a good to do list! There is just something aesthetically pleasing to crossing off the accomplishments of the day. Furthermore, once something is in writing, it becomes less nagging and easier to remember.
  4. Take Action! Spend more time doing than worrying. To use an often repeated adage, “Worry is a misuse of imagination!”

NO MORE MULTI-TASKING

Now that you are more organized, let me offer one more piece of advice. STOP MULTI-TASKING! Yes, you read that correctly. Stop multi-tasking and start mono-tasking. Take a moment as you read this to mute your music. Turn off your television. Put down your sandwich and ignore that text message.  Just read this. That is monotasking. Simple enough?

People love to brag that they can accomplish multiple activities at once; the problem is (according to recent studies) they are not doing those things well. A study in the American Journal of Experimental Psychology found that a mere 3 second interruption doubles mistakes and 4 seconds triples them. In easier terms, the time it takes to read a text can increase your risk of making a mistake! That is terrifying when you see the people texting while driving.

Kelly McGonigal, a psychologist, lecturer at Stanford and the author of “The Willpower Instinct,” believes that monotasking is “something that needs to be practiced.” She said: “It’s an important ability and a form of self-awareness as opposed to a cognitive limitation.”

Having dinner with the family? Put the phones and all the temptations of social media away. Turn off the television then watch the magic of conversation flowing at its best. Imagine going out for lunch and actually taking the time to notice aromas, appearance, flavors and textures instead of staring at your phone or computer monitor. Trust me; your digestion will thank you.

MEDITATION

Meditation is the third item brought to our awareness this month. What a perfect match for those looking to improve the quality of their lives. You have made changes in your day, started working on focusing on one thing at a time and now the wonderful mental vacation of meditating.

What I have observed is that type A, over achieving personality types tend to want to start out at 30+ minutes a day and do it perfectly. Instead, try just 2 minutes a day (already easier to fit into your schedule) and forget about perfection. Just breathe! That’s right, just breathe and count those breathes, while really feeling them enter and leave your body for a total of 2 minutes. That alone will help your brain and improve your day.

May flowers are popping up all over where I live. Birds are singing as I see babies in the nests on my morning walks. In Great Britain, May is National Smile Month. I have plenty of reasons to smile, so perhaps I shall add that to my list of celebrations. How about you?

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Seven Easy Mindfulness Tips

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mindfulnessWhen we ruminate on the past, we aren’t enjoying the now. When we worry about the future, we don’t appreciate the present. Neither ruminating nor worrying solve a thing. When we learn to appreciate the moment, we are home! Sounds good, but how do we manage to do that? Here are seven easy tips for including mindfulness in your day.

Walk With No Destination

I  walk daily. For me it is a moving meditation. Interestingly enough, driving reduces the angle of your field of vision by up to 75%, depending on speed. Walking allows you to see more of your surroundings, so take it in, but remind yourself as you walk: there is nowhere more important for you to be than right here, right now.

Put The Phone Down

Place your phone in a drawer for an hour or two. Ignore social media, the television, anything that might distract you from quiet enjoyment. You just might be surprised and delighted by the results!

Create A Mindfulness Trigger

Choose a cue that you encounter on a regular basis to shift your brain into mindful mode. For instance, you might pick a certain doorway or mirror or use drinking coffee or tea as a reminder.

Wash Dishes Slowly

Wash dishes by hand and take time to notice the soothing warmth of the water on your hands. Be aware of the bubbles and the scent of the dish soap.  Let yourself enjoy the experience of making something dirty clean again. Don’t think about finishing or what you’ll do when you’re finished. Focus solely on the doing.

Eat As If It Was Your Last Meal

Even if dinner was a cheap frozen dinner,  how would you eat that same meal if you knew it might be your last? Would you slow yourself down and savor it more? What would this do for your appreciation of what you consume.  Would you take the time to ponder about and perhaps feel gratitude to everyone involved in creating the meal, from the farmer to the retailer to the chef?

Deep Breathes At Every Stop Light

I often encourage my clients to take a deep breath at each stop light. This can allow you to be less angry when the others in traffic are rude. It also gives you the opportunity to notice the interesting things along your route.

Practice Mindfulness As Soon As You Wake Up

Mindfulness practice first thing in the morning helps set the ‘tone’ of your nervous system for the rest of the day, increasing the likelihood of other mindful moments. Don’t read the paper, turn on the TV, check your phone or email, etc. until after you’ve had your quiet moments of reflection. During that time, just allow the mind to wander, then bring it back to your breath.

 

 

 

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Self-Talk Can Be Loud, So Make It Nice!

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I have written about self-talk before. It is such a part of how we see ourselves. Yesterday it dawned on me that it was time for me to take inventory of the things I have been saying. I woke up anxious for no apparent reason and when I checked in with my “gut” there was still no reason to feel that way other than the fiction in my head. Therefore I reached out to a hypnosis friend of mine and she assisted me in making a change from stinking thinking to nurturing thoughts. It is time for me to practice mindfulness in my thoughts.

I realized that as I awoke, my thoughts were busy trying to get work accomplished and I hadn’t even lifted my head off of the pillow. My husband awoke with loving thoughts. Even the puppies woke up looking for belly rubs.  Next, looking in the mirror I was far too quick to look at my bedhead instead of my smile. I realized that I have been critical of myself if I don’t get done quickly enough. I am not living in a pressure cooker, other than the one I had created for myself.

Becoming aware of self-talk

Now I stop and notice what my thoughts are. If the things I am thinking are not kind or add value to my day, I will change (even challenge) them. If I notice my bedhead first, I will laugh and think, looks like you had a great night’s sleep! If I make a mistake, I think how can I learn from this experience and stop berating myself.

Take a moment and ask yourself throughout the day, what are the things you say to yourself?  During those quiet times, maybe when driving or waiting for someone and you have that chatter in your head. It’s your inner voice speaking to you.   What is that voice saying to you?   When you forget something, what do you say to yourself?  When you realize you have made a mistake, what do you say to yourself? Are you kind, funny or compassionate?  Are you encouraging, uplifting?

If you are critical, negative or hard on yourself, ask yourself why. If you wouldn’t speak to a friend or loved one in the same tone, then it is time to change that tone. Would you allow a stranger to speak to you that way? If not, then it is time for change. We teach others how to treat us. If we are busy being nasty to ourselves, how can we expect any different from others?

How we speak to ourselves is reflective in our posture, facial expressions and even our tone of voice. Our mood sours when we are nasty to ourselves. No one wants to be around a sour puss. Furthermore, it is natural for us to want to be right. So if our self-talk is negative, we create a self-fulfilling prophesy. Remember that all powerful subconscious mind. It hears and obeys.

Thought: I am so forgetful!

Response: Subconscious mind blocks a memory.

Thought: I am so fat

Response: Subconscious mind goads us into emotional eating or skipping exercise.

Begin to notice your thoughts. Notice the negative ones and think in terms of a healthier thought. Write down the new thought on an index card you can keep handy. Next time you find yourself going in the direction of negative, pull out the card and read aloud the new healthy thought.  Read it aloud three times to really plant that new concept in your mind. In sessions I will often compare the subconscious mind to fertile ground. Whatever we plant, will grow. If we plant flower seeds, we get flowers. If we plant poison ivy seeds, we get poison ivy. Whichever seeds we nurture will flourish. It is time to put that negative self-talk in the trash bin and take the positive encouraging self-talk and place it where it will get lots of attention and grow.

self-talk flower

Take a moment now to think how you want to live. How do you want others to speak to you? What do you want to feel about yourself? Now imagine that those words are petals of a beautiful flower that you are growing. Look over in your mind’s eye those petals, see those thoughts flourish and breathe in the fragrance of beauty. You could put a picture of your favorite flower on the index card where you have written the new thoughts. That way every time you reread the positive thoughts you also see the flower. Soon, all you will want to do is stop, take a deep breath in as if you were breathing in the scent of that flower and the good thoughts will start to roll!

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Thank You For Your Military Service

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military service

I have had calls from military personnel who want to make changes. Their budget doesn’t always allow for the extras, even when those extras are needed. I wanted to make it possible for them to experience hypnosis without breaking the bank. Therefore I am offering a special discount to all active military and Veterans as a thank you for your military service.

 

Click Here to set your discounted appointment today!

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Tips For Heart Healthy Month

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Calm mind brings inner strength and self-confidence, so that’s very important for good health.

~Dalai Lama

Fifty years ago our then president, President Lyndon Johnson declared February as American Heart Month. Since that time, the rate of deaths in America caused by cardiovascular diseases has dropped by almost 1 million people per year. February is also the month for lovers with Valentines. So it seems only natural to focus on the heart and how to help keep yours healthy. The American Heart Association recommends seven activities: exercise, eating better, losing weight, managing your blood pressure, reducing your blood sugar and stopping a smoking habit.

Maintaining good emotional and mental health is just as important as your physical health

Learning to express your emotions is not only good for your relationships, but can improve your overall health. The brain is a muscle, and just like other muscles in the body, the brain needs to be exercised to stay healthy. Tapping into emotions and learning how to communicate them effectively works those brain muscles, helping to keep them alert and healthy. In addition, expressing your emotions will help you maintain a healthy emotional balance, which will have a positive effect on your relationships with others.

Our bodies reflect what we think about and focus on

I have mentioned previously that holding on to anger can affect your weight. Excess weight is a strain on the heart and the brain! One of the best things you can do for your heart, your brain and your emotions is to move! Get out there and play. This year for Valentines why not take your one true love on an active date, whether it is bicycling, walking through a park or a round of golf? I am a big believer that giving activities as a gift is a great way to give something memorable. Imagine giving tennis or dance lessons to your sweetie. You can attend together and keep the spark alive, while improving your health.

If there isn’t a special someone in your life right now, treat yourself to some loving. Get out and volunteer. Nothing makes the heart feel better than doing a good deed and helping others who are in need. Use the day to celebrate the gift of giving. Often what happens is the volunteer gets as much (sometimes more) benefit as the recipient. I even know of a couple who met while volunteering, that was an unexpected benefit for sure!

Use this month and the heart healthy awareness as a way to start healthy new ways of thinking. Write down things that you are grateful for before bed at night. You will sleep better and awaken feeling more upbeat. If you have that someone special, begin to make a list of all the ways you love them. Find reasons to smile and to laugh, every day. Share those with family and friends.

Get a stress-busting hobby

You can’t avoid stress entirely. It’s part of a normal life. But you can choose how you deal with it. Managing stress in a healthy way, whether it’s meditation, yoga, or knitting, is really important. Hobbies are often thought of as activities for people who lead quiet, relaxed lives. However, people with full, busy, even stressful lives may need hobbies more than the average person, and benefit greatly from having hobbies in their lives.

One study found that those who engage in physical leisure activities for at least 20 minutes once a week are less susceptible to fatigue. Other research found that enjoyable activities performed during leisure time were associated with lower blood pressure, total cortisol, waist circumference, and body mass index, and perceptions of better physical function. Such activities were also correlated with higher levels of positive psychosocial states and lower levels of depression.

Make changes, pick just one to start. Notice how much better you feel after the change becomes a part of your routine and then you can add another. I encourage you to listen to hypnosis audios for a change of heart as well. Hypnosis can assist you in making those changes a permanent part of your life. A heart healthy and happy life!

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Self-Love Is Healthy Love!

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“Love yourself first and everything falls into line.”                               Lucille Ball

 

Stuart Smalley got the message, even if his delivery was funny:

Is the chatter in your head critical? Do you find yourself doubting your abilities? Stop what you are doing for a moment and just listen to your thoughts. Chances are that you have been saying more negative than positive things to yourself.  Studies have in fact confirmed that we do 300-400 evaluations per day and the majority of it is negative.

It is time to stop the constant flow of negative self-talk and begin to appreciate you. You will get plenty of knocks and bruises to your ego from co-workers, bosses and even total strangers who are having a bad day and want to share the poison. You don’t need to buy into it or pile on top of it. In order to be healthy, you want to learn to love yourself. When you make a decision to love yourself, you are really saying that you want to come alive.

Self-love is important for a healthy mind and body.

It might not seem that important at first glance, it may even seem selfish to some, but it has a huge impact on so many aspects of our lives. It influences our relationships, our choice of friends and romantic partners, how you are perceived at work, and the choices you make in your daily life. It impacts your inner health as well.

When you fill your mind with negative and/or hateful energy, you can actually make yourself physically ill. The body hears everything the mind tells it. Stressing about lack of progress in the gym and beating yourself up mentally for the way your body looks for example, can increase the hormone cortisol. An increase in cortisol can put your body in a catabolic state. A catabolic state is the destruction of cell life. This can cause muscle loss, tissue destruction, bone loss, and a weakened immune system. High cortisol levels can also make it harder to lose body fat, specifically in the abdominal region.

self-love cycle

Learning to love you starts with making a conscious decision, an intention to become happy and lead a fulfilled life. The next step is to take inventory of your thoughts and begin to adjust them. Notice when you are saying those mean comments that you would never say aloud to others and change the pattern. Ask yourself if you would say such things to your best friend, if not, then you don’t want to say them to yourself. Period. End of mean comments.

You might, however, want to take a moment to examine those negative thoughts and figure out where they originated in you. Did an over tired parent say something similar when you were a child? Perhaps they were said by a coach, mentor, sibling? As a child you may have been unable to defend yourself and helplessly learned to accept those comments as gospel. But now, the older and more mature you knows them to be wrong. So stop believing lies!

People who love themselves tend to be more mindful, they tend to know what they think, feel and want. They are mindful of who they are and act on this knowledge, rather than on what others want for them. They listen with their heart instead of the constant inner critic. It helps to start each day with a few minutes of quiet meditation, followed by writing in a journal. I often have my clients keep a notepad in their lap during hypnosis. As they emerge from trance and pick up the pen to write, more information will flow onto the page. Sometimes tears will flow as well. It is powerful to find out that you really do deserve love. You are worthy of a good and happy life.

Remember that loving yourself isn’t a one-time event. It is an endless, ongoing process. Start today practicing self-love and enjoy the benefits of better health all around!

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Is Anger Keeping You Fat?

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Is anger making or keeping you fat? At some point or another, we all get angry. There are times we will rationalize that it is justified, circumstances call for such emotion. Still, anger has some pretty profound negative effects on your body. Anger can have a destructive—even deadly—effect on your health. According to Dr. Don Colbert, M.D., author of Deadly Emotions, anger can profoundly damage your health. “Depression, anger, guilt, condemnation, low self-esteem…these are only a few of the lethal toxins…,” Dr. Colbert warns.
He supports these claims with scientific evidence about the effects of anger on the physiological aspect. Anger triggers a biologically embedded “fight-or-flight” response. In ancient times, when human beings faced physical threats like animal predators, the fight-or-flight response saved our lives by pumping our bodies with hormones and chemicals necessary to fuel intense physical action. In modern times, that is usually not necessary. In fight-or-flight, your body’s resources mobilize for immediate physical action. Any bodily function not directly related to fighting or fleeing is put on hold, including digestion, cell production and body maintenance.

Marianne’s Anger Sabotage

Marianne was proud of the twenty five pounds she had lost on her new diet and exercise regimen. It was easy and enjoyable. A few days later she was part of a decision making team at work. Arguments and insults flying around made her afraid to give her opinion. Marianne sensed something was missing and she grabbed a pillow and then placed it in on her abdomen. What a relief! During that stressful moment Marianne missed the ‘padding’ that her fat had provided. The cushion blanketed the messy feeling.

On her drive home she thought about the meeting and felt demeaned and diminished. Why was it okay for her colleagues to vent, but leave no space for her views? Anger rose up. Her rage felt like shards of sharp glass ready to lacerate her insides. Marianne stopped at a store and bought a cheesecake and a large bag of potato chips. That combination was her most trusted and true numbing device. The sharp glass became frozen with layers of reassuring and calming comfort food. No chance of any disgusting leaks of weakness. Keeping her cool was rewarded by yummy admiration and scrumptious respect. Later, she felt remorse, guilt and bloating.

There is an acronym used by those wanting to stop drinking, “HALT“. They are told not to drink when Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired. The same would apply to binge eating. Often I see clients who will follow a diet so carefully and then self-sabotage when someone or something makes them angry. I will share with them something the Buddha said, “Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.”

It is important that we look at our emotions and try to understand what they are telling us. Anger stems from pain, so what is it about the situation that is hurting? What do you need to change in your life regrading that emotion? Trust your first signs of anger as a signal to protect yourself, then re-cycle your angry energy into motivation to be heard and acknowledged. Use the motivation to risk saying what you feel as you become aware of it. Feel the validation of taking that risk rather than the weight of keeping it all in, and then build on that feeling. Remember to HALT, think before you stuff yourself like a waste bin.

Exercise is a key component in maintaining more balanced emotions. Use that energy in a positive way. Release those feel good hormones into your system. If you know that you’re going to be entering into a situation that is likely to make you angry, go for a brisk walk first.  The walk might be useful not just because it works off some excess energy but also because it gives you a chance to think about what made you angry in the first place – or how you want to handle the situation.

If you need help with anger or angry (emotional) eating, consider hypnosis. We can utilize the power of your subconscious mind to find that pain and eradicate it. You deserve to feel good, look good and live well! Don’t give your power away to anger or pain.

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Do I Scare You? Hypnophobia Might Be The Reason…

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Are you afraid of me? Or, more to the point are you afraid of what I do? It is always a surprise to me when I offer to help someone and they refuse the help because they are afraid of hypnosis. Sometimes they will tell me they don’t believe in hypnosis, but usually that is a fear based belief.

 

First of all, saying you do or don’t believe in hypnosis is kind of like saying you do or don’t believe in thinking. Whether or not you want to believe in it, you will think. Same thing with hypnosis; it exists and it is real and you will experience it at some level throughout your life. Now, you may not believe it works and if that is the case, it probably won’t work for you.  If you are open to the possibility of it working, most likely it will work for you.

I love when a new client says they have heard good things about hypnosis, but they aren’t sure if they can be hypnotized.  This shows me that they are about to uncover some amazing abilities they never knew they had.

The term for the fear of being hypnotized is called hypnophobia (that is for the full-blown irrational fear). This term is also used to mean a fear of sleep, but not all hypnophobes are afraid of sleeping at night. In its mild state, people might only be slightly concerned of what might happen to them if they were hypnotized, but in its fullest expression, this fear becomes haunting and may greatly affect how well people are able to pursue their lives.  These aren’t rational fears; most people can’t be hypnotized against their will or forced to do anything they don’t want to when under hypnosis. Phobias, though, aren’t rational, and so these fears build.

I have done quite a bit of work with sleep issues. It began when my husband could not sleep after his quadruple bypass. We worked together to get him to sleep peacefully. He was suffering and unable to sleep, after a few sessions, he could put himself to sleep in a matter of minutes. This led me to working with other heart patients; eventually expanding to other sleep issues. So, when a neighbor of mine had a traumatic experience that was affecting her sleep, I offered her a free hypnosis session. Her response was visceral, instant rejection. We have remained friends, but I will respect her boundaries.

Recently another person posted on Facebook about sleep issues. A friend of mine, who has used hypnosis for sleep encouraged her to see me. When I reached out, I heard crickets. Again, I will respect her choice not to use hypnosis, it just makes me sad that someone who can’t sleep also can’t get help because of a fear.

So, I ask you, dear reader, are you afraid of hypnosis? Are you willing to let that fear control your life? After all, if hypnosis can help you resolve your worries and overcome your obstacles, why not give it a try? If you read the FAQ’s on hypnosis, does that change your mind? What will it take for you to be free in 2016?

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Hypnosis Award

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hypnosis award

The recent Hypnosis Education Association (HEA) conference was so much fun!   The first night was an informal dinner and crazy gifts  exchange. Because I love to stir the pot and make the game more fun, I kept stealing the gifts that a founding member, Lynn Groves had. It wasn’t that I was out for her, she just kept getting the most fun stuff to steal!

The next morning, classes were given by some of the most knowledgeable people in the hypnosis professions. I learned a bunch of techniques to add to my tool box! Even the lunch was a great opportunity to pick the brains of these talented individuals. Saturday night was a dinner and hypnosis awards were given out. Seeing the talent that surrounded me, I couldn’t wait to see who was honored. Sure enough, the awards went to  some pretty great people. Then the President (Carol Perrine) began to talk about the Lynn Groves Keys To Excellence  hypnosis award. As she is describing the honoree, I began to notice we had some common traits and experiences.

My name was called and I was stunned! Almost speechless. I just kept shaking my head as I got up to accept the award from Lynn Groves! I had to tease her and say that once again I was taking something from her. I am so humbled and grateful to the HEA for all that I have learned attending the conferences and also for the recognition that they have given me.

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Hypnosis Is Safe

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court

Hypnosis On Trial, The Jury Of Public Opinion

Recently, poor publicity has been spread about hypnosis. A case here in Florida involving a principal who used hypnosis on students and teachers has been in the news. The families of three North Port High School students who died after being hypnotized by former Principal George Kenney will receive $200,000 each from the Sarasota County School District under a settlement agreement unanimously approved by the School Board at its meeting last Tuesday night. The Board stated that they just want to put the events behind them.

The $600,000 settlement closes a year- long case that began after former North Port High School Principal Kenney admitted he hypnotized 16-year-old Wesley McKinley a day before the teenager committed suicide in April 2011. A subsequent investigation found that Kenney hypnotized as many as 75 students, staff members and others from 2006 until McKinley’s death. One basketball player at the school said Kenney hypnotized him 30 to 40 times to improve his concentration.

The case was settled without going to trial, but has raised concerns about the safety of hypnosis. Hypnosis…the very word conveys dramatic images. The public either imagines a strange character waving a pendulum or a group of silly people on stage acting like ducks. Both of these images imply that hypnosis can be used to control your mind. Nothing could be further from the truth. No one can ever use hypnosis to control another person. The individual gives their permission when they are being hypnotized. In fact all hypnosis is self-hypnosis and it is an incredible tool for managing the mind.

HYPNOSIS IS SAFE!

“Contrary to how hypnosis is sometimes portrayed, you don’t lose control over your behavior while under hypnosis,” experts at the Mayo Clinic write. “You generally remain aware of and remember what happens under hypnosis.”

The human mind and its processes have always seemed mysterious and fascinating, but learning the nature of the mind has become the province of experimental science only during relatively recent times. “Hypnosis is a mental state, not, per se, a treatment,” says Dr. David Spiegel, medical director of the Center for Integrative Medicine at Stanford University School of Medicine. “People think it is a means of taking away control, but it is actually a means of enhancing control over perceptions such as pain, anxiety, habits, stress.”

More and more we have become aware that there is a tremendous connection between what happens in our minds and how it affects our bodies. Most of our serious diseases are thought to have some contributing mental and emotional factors. There is research on creating wellness that includes beginning with our minds and emotions. Visualization techniques are being widely used to help fight disease and its’ symptoms. There are also many non-therapeutic uses of hypnosis for instance sales, public speaking and sports that enhance performance and improve success.

It is in some ways unfortunate that this case never came to trial. Hypnosis was tried in the court of public opinion and was found guilty by association. It does not mean that hypnosis caused these events. I have many, many clients like you, dear reader who has used hypnosis to successfully make changes. I love the many ways that hypnosis can benefit any and every one! Whether it is to stop smoking, shed those extra pounds or overcome fears and phobias, hypnosis is a wonderful tool to have.

Because of the publicity, I have had many inquiries from individuals and even concerned colleagues. People who were afraid that this would send hypnosis back to the dark ages. I believe that this has opened up a dialogue that will help everyone to better understand just how easy it is to make powerful and positive strides in life with the use of our own minds!
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