balance

How I Am Coping During The Quarantine

Written by: Debbie

This is my story, maybe it will help inspire you, maybe it won’t. What I am not going to do is tell you how you should be dealing with the quarantine. There are plenty of experts who are offering advice. Also,there are a ton of talking heads stirring up your worst fears and then offering ways to calm them down again, until the next headline. Furthermore, there are too many Hollywood stars doling out admonitions from the comfort of their spacious mansions, creating a resentment from their fan base. I am simply going to share what has worked for me and kept my spirits up.

We started early in the quarantine as my husband’s company decided to start work from home (WFH) almost immediately and why not? The company has the technology to do so. This created a change in my living and working as I was already WFH, however, that included most of my clients coming to see me in my home office. Because my husband and I are no spring chickens and because he has a history of heart concerns, we decided that I needed to move towards online work, via Zoom or Facebook Portal or other means.

Initially, I kept busy

with my clients as my schedule always has been, just done exclusively by remote. Then I noticed the palpable fear of the medical professionals and so I added free sessions to anyone in the field. That has taken over a good number of my sessions. I trust that I will be able to get back to a more balanced schedule soon enough, in the meanwhile this is my way of paying it forward.

I like structure in my life. For me, this means I have continued with a routine. Awakening early every morning to walk the dogs and feed them, followed by my normal schedule of cleaning my home and exercise for my body. Next, I ablute and once dressed, head downstairs to my office. If I have sessions scheduled, I begin with those. Otherwise I am working on paperwork and all the background stuff that I do to keep in business.

Downtime

There is more downtime simply by the nature of this quarantine. That is where it has become particularly important that I use it well. By that, I mean find ways to nurture me. Today, I overheard the backyard neighbors’ little children shrieking with delight as they ran through the water sprinkler. I moved my laptop out to my back porch so I could enjoy the unfettered joy. With my husband home that has given me cherished “water cooler time”. That is time to take a break and just talk about nothing in particular. At the end of our workday, we walk through the park with our dogs. We are in almost total isolation, enjoying the sights and sounds of nature.

I have taken the time to learn new recipes, nothing earth shattering mind you. Still I discovered that enchilada sauce doesn’t have to come from a can. And egg drop soup is relatively easy to make. Claiming a shortage in the meat department, I have even included more plant-based meals into our diet. He is enjoying them!

Although I am unable to physically visit with my sons and their partners, we are fortunate to have the Facebook Portal. Therfore, we have held family happy hours and chat sessions. Most of that time is spent in gales of laughter, just like the old days around our dinner table. Speaking of dinner, we are having our food and supplies delivered. Without the distraction of shiny displays I am saving money! In support of local businesses, we get take-out a few meals a week.

I have had projects waiting for me to have free time. Some of them will still wait, I guess they weren’t a priority. Others, such as going through old photos and scaling back the quantity has given me the gift of recalling some wonderful memories. My plants are happy with the attention given to them now, just like some of my friendships. It is fun exchanging funny memes and thoughts and inspirations with friends and loved ones. It helps me to look for and read what feeds my soul. Selfishly, I am enjoying all the time I have with my husband.

What I am not doing

is overdosing on news. I watch enough to be aware, not so much as to ride the roller coaster that media would provide. Nor am I joining in negativity and trash talking; whether it is social media, texts or phone calls. If a dark moment seems to encroach on my mind or my soul, I do self-hypnosis or meditate. Using the other tools in my toolkit to reframe that moment as well. I am doing my best not to judge anyone else for how they are reacting to this quarantine, no one needs or wants my opinion anyway. Let me note, I refuse to feel guilty if I don’t behave perfectly, these are imperfect times.

Just as I started this, this is my story, it is not meant to “should” on you. I hope it may inspire you. If you have ways of coping that will inspire me, please share! I am always open to new ideas.

Did You Fail At Resolutions?

Written by: Debbie

Are You One of the New Year’s Resolution Failures?

At this point, life has usually settled back into its normal routine now that the holidays are over. Unfortunately, this often includes the return of old habits you had resolved to change.

After all the parties and celebrations, the traditional New Year’s resolution arrives with great hope. However, statistics tell a different story. In fact, only about eight percent of people who make a resolution will successfully keep it. As a result, when a resolution isn’t maintained, it often leads to feelings of disappointment or failure.

Quite honestly, I shudder to think that 92 percent of us may walk around feeling like failures. Moreover, that image brings to mind a kind of emotional “walking dead,” going through the motions while quietly carrying self-blame.

Real Client Stories: Why Resolutions Really Fail

I recently had a client tear up as she shared how she had repeatedly failed at her goal of weight loss. Over the years, she had managed to lower the number on the scale. However, each time, the weight returned — and often surpassed her previous high.

This year, she believed, was finally going to be her year. Unfortunately, when she “failed” again, the tears poured down her face. While in trance, however, she made a powerful discovery. She realized she was unconsciously sabotaging herself due to old, unresolved family issues.

From there, we shifted our focus. Instead of working on weight loss, we worked on forgiveness. In addition, we addressed the lessons hidden within those painful experiences. We also focused on rebuilding her self-esteem. Notably, what we did not work on was her weight.

And here’s the part you already expect. As a result of this inner work, her weight began to drop naturally. In other words, once she stopped stuffing emotions and protecting herself with extra layers, her body no longer needed to hold on.

When Quitting Smoking Isn’t About Nicotine

Similarly, another woman contacted me about her desire to quit smoking. In the past, she had made it as far as three months smoke-free. However, each time, she eventually picked up a cigarette again.

She told me, “I just can’t fail again. I need to quit.” Instead of immediately agreeing, I encouraged her to come in so we could determine whether she was truly ready. Using muscle testing, we confirmed that she genuinely wanted to stop. Therefore, the next step was to find the real key.

As we talked, she revealed something important. She had started smoking with her sister, sneaking cigarettes from their parents. Over time, smoking became a bonding ritual. Even years later, she continued smoking “in memory” of her sister.

Consequently, quitting felt like abandonment. Once we uncovered that belief, everything changed. Together, we found a new way to honor her sister — one that aligned with health and self-care. Most importantly, she realized her sister would want her to live fully and well. In that moment, she stopped smoking.

Children, Coping, and Unconscious Habits

In another case, a gentleman called to ask about his son’s nail biting. His son desperately wanted to stop and regularly made it a resolution. Still, he would find himself unconsciously chewing his nails once again.

Eventually, we traced the behavior back to its origin. The nail biting began during a particularly stressful period. At that time, his mother received a serious medical diagnosis, while his father lost his job due to downsizing. Naturally, the child felt his world turn upside down.

Therefore, our work focused on what he could and could not control. In addition, we strengthened the coping skills he already had and introduced a few new ones. Interestingly, we never directly addressed the nail biting. Nevertheless, once his nervous system felt safer, the behavior stopped on its own.

Why Hypnosis Works When Willpower Fails

Ultimately, there are as many resolutions as there are people making them. If you find a method that truly works for you, by all means, use it. However, if you continue to struggle despite sincere effort, it may be time to look deeper.

That is where hypnosis can help. Whether your goal is to build unshakable self-confidence, quit smoking, lose weight, or eliminate insomnia, change becomes possible when you work with the inner mind. After all, hypnosis is a powerful tool for creating lasting transformation.

Your mind is extraordinarily powerful. Therefore, when you learn how to harness it intentionally, you can use that power for your growth, healing, and long-term success.

Curious What Your Inner Mind Is Ready to Release?

Sometimes the hardest part of change isn’t effort — it’s knowing where to begin. Hypnosis helps uncover the root of habits that no longer serve you and gently guides your mind toward healthier, more supportive choices.

If something in this article resonated with you, that’s not an accident. It may be your inner mind signaling that it’s ready for something new.

Reach out to learn more about hypnosis sessions and how they can support the changes you’ve been trying to make: 727-215-0283

More about how hypnosis can help you: https://wisdomhypnosis.com/services/

Woman holding a baby, both smiling happily.

Finding Balance

Written by: Debbie

In The Midst Of Chaos

The message was on my phone when I awoke on a Saturday morning about one and a half months ago. My mother was found on the floor in a fetal position, scared, undressed and confused. When she couldn’t be helped up, the ambulance was called and she was taken to a local hospital. Since then I have spent part of almost every day with her, first at the hospital and now at the rehab center. As anyone who has dealt with an aging parent knows, it can be a rollercoaster of highs, lows and in-betweens. Simultaneously, I have been spending some time with a friend who has her own health challenges. A modern living room with a white sectional sofa and large windows.

My challenge, I found was to maintain balance. Or at this moment, finding balance. You know the balance I so often speak of? Now was a chance to put into practice what I teach. While I am not new to this, ‘crisis management’ is not my first choice of fun things to do. But, I want to live a happy and fun life.

Naturally the first thing to remember is to breathe. What happens in stressful situations? We get tense and experience shortness of breath. Driving to and from, I noticed I was holding my breath and choking the steering wheel. I reminded myself on the way to visit Mom, take deep breathes at every stop light. I found myself enjoying the commute, it was a chance to clear my head and prepare for whatever I was going to next encounter. Cars that raced ahead of mine I noticed often ended waiting at the same lights with me. Hmmm…..

Finding the humor in every day is vital. Mom was always a funny woman, bright and a great story teller. I had asked her a few years ago to answer in emails a series of questions about her childhood. This was to preserve those memories for my sons. They have come in handy now, as I could remind her of them and get her to laugh with me. We laughed over memories of pets, naughty things my younger brothers had pulled (as twins they were truly double trouble) and ways she had hoodwinked her own beleaguered mother. What she didn’t know was that some of the things she would say in her moments of confusion, I posted on my Facebook account to allow me to save the humor in even this situation.

Facebook Posts

Mom: I need a hypnotist

Me: Mom, I am a hypnotist

Mom: A real, bona-fide hypnotist?

Me: Yes, the real deal, I have won awards for my work.

What do you need?

Mom: Oh never mind, I can’t remember.

Mom told me her pain pill was confused, it thought it was a computer. I asked her if she could use her programming skills to create a pain free experience. She decided to develop that process.

I do my best to get proper sleep, exercise and eat healthy. It is easy when one is busy to forget those things; still it is very important to remember self-care. If I find myself slipping, I practice self-hypnosis. Taking the time for a session can turn the day around! Sometimes it is as typical a session as releasing the stress, other times it might be allowing my subconscious mind to direct me to how to resolve an issue that arises. Always it is a good opportunity to refresh and return to calm within, regardless of chaos that might be surrounding me.

I can’t rehearse for guilt

Another balance tool is sharing a little time with a friend. Some friends I reach out to by phone, others in person. Sometimes it is to vent or cry, but most times to “catch up” and laugh. Just today I had an opportunity to meet with a friend, unscheduled! I had an appointment on my calendar, but it was rescheduled at last minute. This left me with time that I could dutifully go see my mother, work on paperwork, clean or any of a dozen tasks. I thought about it for a moment and decided all those things were going to continue to call out to me, but I craved friendship and balance. I called a girlfriend who met up with me and we had a marvelous time.

As we were speaking, I said to her that I knew I could end up feeling guilty for the things I didn’t do for my mother when she eventually leaves us. However, I also know that the stages of grief will happen. Therefore, it dawned on me that I can’t rehearse for guilt. That wasn’t going to eliminate the guilt later, only mess up the NOW. Balance means living in the now.

Although it is hard to say no when Mom wants me, there are times I have to. Refusing the woman who I have loved my entire life is a challenge. It is then that I must recall that just as she had to say no to me at times as I grew up, I may have to do the same now. At times I allow the professionals to take over. She sent me to school and that meant that others watched over and guided me, just as the nurses and caregivers where she is are doing the same for her.

FindingBalance

The search for balance is hard but necessary. With a healthy balance, the guilt will not feel as prevalent. The answer is never obvious. It is important to keep my mind open to new ways to explore it, balance is never that far away. Balance is within.

Slow Down and Reduce Stress: Find Your Peace

Written by: Debbie

Slow Down — Don’t Move So Fast

Learning to slow down has become one of the greatest challenges of modern life. As Simon and Garfunkel once sang, many of us move too fast to truly enjoy where we are.

The desire to slow down is not new. For as long as humanity has existed, people have searched for ways to live with more ease and less pressure. Ironically, the more time-saving technology we create, the busier we become.

Today, many people watch television while scrolling online. Others walk down the street talking on the phone. Music plays while we drive, and messages are checked at stoplights.

We are always doing something.

The Hidden Cost of Constant Busyness

Modern work life adds another layer of pressure. Economic concerns and productivity expectations push many people to use every waking moment trying to accomplish more.

According to the American Psychological Association, workplace stress affects millions of Americans each year.

However, workplace stress is not uncommon, and how we deal with it can have a significant impact. Chronic stress affects both mental and physical health and carries significant costs for individuals and businesses alike.

Perhaps Simon and Garfunkel were right.

It is a conscious choice to slow down. It isn’t always easy, but it leads to deeper appreciation, better health, and greater happiness.

7 Simple Ways to Slow Down and Reduce Stress

1. Do Less

It is difficult to slow down when you are trying to do everything.

Ask yourself:
Is this truly necessary?

Focus on what matters most and let go of the rest. Build space between tasks and appointments so you can move through your day with intention instead of urgency.

2. Be Present

Slowing down requires more than moving slowly — it requires awareness.

When your mind drifts into the past or worries about the future, gently return to the present moment.

Notice how our pets live. They are not worried about tomorrow’s meal; they simply want to share this moment with you.

Observe your surroundings. Notice your actions. Fully experience now.

Presence takes practice — and it is profoundly worthwhile.

3. Disconnect

If you carry a smartphone everywhere, experiment with turning it off occasionally — or leaving it behind.

Constant availability creates constant interruption. When we disconnect from devices, we reconnect with ourselves.

Even short breaks from technology can dramatically reduce stress levels.

4. Appreciate Nature

Many of us move between home, car, and office without truly experiencing the outdoors.

Step outside intentionally.

Feel fresh air. Notice water, greenery, sunlight, and wind. Walk, swim, kayak, or simply sit quietly in nature.

Even a few minutes outdoors each day can reset the nervous system.

5. Eat Slowly

Rushing meals disconnects us from nourishment and often leads to overeating.

Before eating, take three deep breaths.

Notice flavors, textures, and aromas. Eating slowly helps you feel satisfied sooner — and enjoy your food more deeply.

6. Allow Yourself to Daydream

Daydreaming is often misunderstood as unproductive, yet research shows it enhances creativity.

When stress decreases, the brain accesses deeper problem-solving and imaginative pathways.

Close your door. Turn off electronics. Sit quietly for five to ten minutes and let your mind wander.

Your next insight may arrive when you finally pause.

7. Breathe

When life speeds up, pause.

Take a slow, deep breath.
Then another.

Feel the air entering your body and stress leaving with each exhale.

Notice how babies — and animals — breathe naturally through the diaphragm, their bellies gently rising and falling.

Return to that natural rhythm whenever you need to slow yourself down.

Slowing Down Is a Choice

Life rarely slows itself.

We must choose it.

And when we do, we often rediscover something simple and profound:

Peace was never missing — only our attention was.

If you want to take a moment right now to slow down and relax, visit my website here for the free audio: Serenity

Person sitting peacefully by water at sunrise, symbolizing slowing down and reducing stress.

A calm sunrise scene near water representing mindfulness, relaxation, and the intentional choice to slow down and reconnect with the present moment.

Silver trophy engraved with Angel Award 2016 for Debbie Lane.

Tampa Named Most Stressed-Out City In The U.S.

Written by: Debbie

Tampa made a top 10 list, in fact it made it to the number one spot! But, not a list we like to brag about around here.

Sperling’s BestPlaces, a research firm specializing in livability rankings, has released its new study of major cities with the most and least stress. The study analyzed a variety of factors associated with stress, including suicide, divorce, crime, joblessness and lengthy commuting.
With that in mind, I decided to do my part to help reduce the stress. It may not be the cure, but if it even helps change one attitude, I believe the butterfly effect may begin.

Click Here For Calm

Be sure you have a few minutes to enjoy, uninterrupted. Then please, share with anyone you might know that could use a moment of comfort.

Legacy: What Will You Be Remembered For?

Written by: Debbie

What qualities would you like to be remembered for? When you think about your personal legacy, consider the impact you hope to leave behind.

Loving. Friendly. Creative. Steadfast. Warm-hearted. Reliable. Humorous.

What is it for you?

Your legacy is not created at the end of life — it is shaped daily through the way you live, think, and treat others. The qualities you practice today quietly become the lessons future generations learn from you.

So begin now.

Practice the Qualities You Want to Leave Behind

Monitor your thoughts and treat yourself with compassion. The relationship you have with yourself becomes the model for how you relate to the world.

Take time each day to feel gratitude for life’s simple pleasures — morning light, shared laughter, a peaceful moment of breathing. Research from the Greater Good Science Center at UC Berkeley shows that practicing gratitude improves emotional well-being, resilience, and overall life satisfaction.

Breathe deeply.
Just two minutes of focused breathing each day teaches your nervous system how to return to calm and clarity.

Move your body daily. Exercise strengthens not only your muscles but also your emotional resilience and mental well-being.

Protect your rest. Turn off the television, silence the endless scrolling, and allow your mind the quiet it needs to restore itself.

Eat mindfully. Notice the flavors, textures, and aromas of your food. Nourishment is both physical and emotional.

Release clutter — in your home and in your mind. Clutter occupies space in your environment and in your thoughts.

Let go of guilt. Guilt often lives in the past and rarely helps us grow. Choose learning instead of self-punishment.

Find reasons to smile and laugh. Joy is contagious and leaves a lasting imprint on those around you.

Follow your spiritual path, whatever form that takes for you. Meaning gives direction to a life well lived.

Your Legacy Begins Today

You can evolve into the person you aspire to be.

What you practice becomes what others witness.
What others witness becomes what they remember.

So ask yourself:

What will your legacy be?

Monday Morning Musings….

Written by: Debbie

It was an exceptionally busy weekend with Valentines, a birthday party and a hockey game to attend. Somehow we managed to squeeze that in along with chores and errands. I even managed to go out with two fabulous women for dinner one evening. What became evident to me however, is the importance of balance.

I love my work, I feel amazingly blessed to be able to work in the area of hypnosis. At times I become all hypnosis, all the time. Then my family begins to protest. They keep me aware that “all work and no play makes Debbie a dull girl”. Have you ever had a friend who only talked about their kids or their pets or their illnesses? A steady diet of anything gets boring.

Give yourself the gift of a few moments today to stop and breathe, smile and relax. Think of a way that you can bring balance back into your life. Do you work nonstop, gripe continually or just feel overwhelmed? What might be different about you if you were feeling more balanced?

What can you do today, to create just a little more balance in your day? If stress is the problem, go here for a free stress reducing download.