A girlfriend of mine told me when she got a divorce that she would be happy when she finally found her soul mate. Well, that was eleven years ago and she is still searching. Funny thing, she still tells me the same thing. That makes me sad, after all, that is eleven years of not being happy! Many of my clients tell me when they reach a goal they will be able to be happy. I am in favor of them working towards those stated goals; I help many people along the journey of change they desire. Still, why must people wait to be happy?

By waiting for a future of happiness, we are living in a state of future thought, missing out on the now. How can one be mindful if they are always living in a fantasy of future times? It seems to me that happiness shouldn’t be something dangling out there in tomorrow or someday. It isn’t a feeling to experience once something else happens. Happiness is to be experienced now, in this moment. When our focus is on the future and we connect happiness to future events we can miss out on any immediate opportunities for joy and fulfillment.

You will find that happiness is more powerful when experienced as an immediate emotion instead of a carrot to be sought after. Ironically, people often discover that when they place future conditions on happiness, when those conditions are met, the pleasure is not what they had expected. The key is to learn how to release the unknown future and the past and allow the goodness of the moment to fill you with inner peace. The present moment is all that we have. It is when you find meaning and satisfaction in the present; you’ll discover that your future will take care of itself.

While everything may not be perfect in your world right now, there are still things to appreciate. A beautiful sunrise, a secret joke shared between friends, the laughter of a child. I was recently in the grocery store when a mother of young children was trying to get her little ones and her groceries put into the car. When she finished, she was hesitant to leave the car to return the cart to the cart corral. It was one of those carts with the double seat and steering wheel that the kids love. Well, an older couple parked next to her took the cart to return it for her. The older man acted as if he was going to climb in to drive and the kids howled with laughter. Observing the whole scene sure made me happy.

I challenge you to spend a day focusing on what is going on in your surroundings and find a reason to smile and laugh. Warning: happiness is contagious and you might become a carrier!