Gracious + Attitude = Gratitude

Written by: Debbie

Thanksgiving commemorates a harvest festival celebrated by the Pilgrims in 1621, and is held in the US on the fourth Thursday in November. It is a day set aside to give thanks for the bounty of the previous year, although it often ends up with feasting, football and now even shopping for the upcoming holidays. Hence, we have one day a year to express our gratitude, between these other activities. Yet, is one day a year, during commercial breaks really enough?

Research has found that grateful people are more likely to:

-Take better care of themselves physically and mentally

-Engage in more protective health behaviors and maintenance

-Get more regular exercise

-Eat a healthier diet

-Have improved mental alertness

-Schedule regular physical examinations with their doctor

-Cope better with stress and daily challenges

-Feel happier and more optimistic

-Avoid problematic physical symptoms

-Have stronger immune systems

-Maintain a brighter view of life

So, perhaps a daily flexing of the gratitude muscle is in order. I call it a muscle to show you that gratitude is not just a feeling, if it was, we would feel it all the time. Gratitude is the combination of being gracious and one’s attitude. I want all the benefits listed above, so I decided to start daily rituals of gratitude. Daily reminders of what is right in my life as opposed to running the constant treadmill of more, more more!

Here are simple ways you can join me in this practice.

Good Morning and Thank You! Before you even get out of bed, take 2 minutes to reflect on whoever or whatever you are grateful for. Just a silent thank you will set the tone of your day to come.

Say Thank You. Whenever someone does something nice, say thank you. Mean it. No matter how small, recognize the kindnesses in your life.

Write a handwritten note of thanks. How many handwritten notes have you gotten lately. If you are like most people, not many. Texting and email has replaced the art of the written note. Yet, just send out one note a day and see how good you feel. It doesn’t have to be long or fancy, after all it is the thought that counts. (Especially for you!) It can even be a note of thanks left on the desk of a co-worker or written on a bill along with the payment.

List 3 reason for gratitude at the end of your day. Keeping a gratitude journal is easy when it is only 3 reasons at the end of the day. On the days you feel less than grateful, you have your journal as a reminder of the good things in your life.

As always, feel free to drop by my website to listen to a free audio.

Please, leave anything you do to enhance your attitude of gracious receiving in the comments below.

Mindful Eating

Written by: Debbie

“Your body is precious. It is our vehicle for awakening. Treat it with care.” ~Buddha

Do you eat too fast and rarely feel satisfied with your food? Are you like so many people, so busy and rushed through out your day that you tend to grab a quick bite? Do you eat at your desk while working? Perhaps you find yourself eating in front of the television or while on your computer? In a world of fast food drive-throughs, we have become accustomed to eating out of bags and cartons, without thought.

Meal time can be a time of communion and appreciation. Appreciation for the bounty of foods we have available to us as well as to the hands that prepare it are only a part of being a mindful eater. By eating consciously, we take time to savor flavors, colors, textures and smells. In other words, we are able to enjoy meals by actually taking the time. This will actually help the release of excess weight.

Mindful eating may seem easy, you think about what you want to eat, make it, and then enjoy it. However, if you take the time to be aware of your thoughts while you eat food, you might be surprised at how little of your consciousness is actually present during the act of eating. Research has shown that if you eat while experiencing stress, the digestive system will be disrupted. The short term effect is a lack of assimilation of nutrients; the long term effect if you continually eat while stressed is the potential for irritable bowel syndrome, ulcers, weight gain and eating disorders. By becoming mindful eaters we can find a new joy in eating as well as a new relationship with our reality. Furthermore, when we are more aware of what we are putting into our body, we are more aware of the messages our body is sending us.

Here is an exercise that can help you experience a mindful moment with food. Take a grape, only one and place it into your mouth. As you do, shut your eyes and get a sense for the size, shape and feeling of the grape in your mouth. Roll your tongue around it to feel the texture of the grape. With eyes still closed imagine you can actually see it in your mouth, making the color very rich and vivid. Next, bite into it slowly and feel the juice, be sure to get all the juice out of that one grape that you can. Notice the texture of the grape’s interior and how different it is when it is whole. Chew it slowly and make the experience continue for as long as possible, say, perhaps five minutes. That grape will most likely be the best grape you will ever eat.

Here are 5 quick tips for becoming a mindful eater.

1. Never eat distracted. Turn off the television, computer and phones when you eat.

2. Be aware of your senses. Eating is a multisensory experience; enjoy the appearance of your food, the taste of it, the textures and the aromas.

3. Declare mealtime a time for pleasant conversations only. Eating with family and friends is a communion of the souls. Stress free conversations only!

4. Notice your reactions to foods without judgment. There will be foods you like, those you dislike and those that are neutral. Notice your reactions without deciding if they are right or wrong.

5. Listen to your body. It will send signals of feeling nourished. A simple little affirmation is, “I eat to nourish my body, not feed my emotions”.

Practice mindful eating and it will become a part of who you are.

Happy Halloween!

Written by: Debbie

Walt Disney’s Secret Fear

Written by: Debbie

Yes, Walt Disney had a fear that seems improbable today. Keep reading to find out what it was.

Halloween is a time that we seem to celebrate our fears. We set up scary scenes and haunted houses. We tell ghost stories and watch zombie movies. The instant thrill of fear can be very compelling, we seek the thrill. Some even become addicted to the thrill, but that is for another time and another post. So, what about those who are unhappily consumed by fear?

Fear can be productive; a warning to keep us safe if there is a hungry tiger ready to attack. This would be an appropriate signal for the fight or flight response. Fear can also be upsetting and limiting. We often fear situations that aren’t life or death. We can easily learn to overcome fear, although it may take time. When fear crosses over into phobia, it becomes life altering and that may take the help of professional using tools such as hypnosis.

Here are some simple steps to overcoming fear.

· Cultivate Awareness. It is important to recognize that fear is limiting your enjoyment of life in order to begin the process of overcoming it. It’s easy to get attached to your thoughts and feelings.

· Identify what exactly you’re afraid of. Notice the pictures in your head about the situation. What is happening in those scenes? What are you really scared of?

· Be curious, about what thoughts fuel the fear, where you feel it and how you react to it.

· Breathe in a sense of calm and imagine the fear as a cartoon. With each breath in, relax, with each exhale and imagine the fear as a cartoon.

· Have fun with it. Find or print out a picture that represents your fear. Punch, kick, or do whatever helps you feel better as you tell the fear that you are bigger and more powerful than the fear. Perhaps you can imagine beating it the way a gamer beats the “boss” in a video game.

· Imagine how you would be without the fear. What would be different about you? How would you talk, walk, hold yourself? Imagine you are free from the fear and practice being that person.

It has been reported that Walt Disney had musophobia or a fear of mice. That leads me to wonder if the creation of Mickey and Minnie and eventually the whole kingdom/world of Disney wasn’t in fact an attempt to overcome his fear. He certainly imagined his fear as a cartoon and had fun with it.

If your fear has become a phobia, you know it isn’t rational, yet nothing you try seems to help eliminate it then it might be time to seek help. Hypnosis is a great tool for changing fearful into powerful!

Franklin Delano Roosevelt said, “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.” Maybe it’s time for you to release the fear and live fully!

5 Tips For Forgetting Regret

Written by: Debbie

Forget the past, watch the present and create the future!

We all have regrets, here are a few quick tips to forgetting yours!

Slow Down, Don’t Move So Fast!

Written by: Debbie

Wish you were “feelin’ groovy” as Simon and Garfunkel once sang? You know, able to slow down because you move too fast? It seems as though that plea has been around for as long as mankind, yet the more we create time savers, the busier we become. We watch TV while surfing the web on our iPads, we walk down the street while talking on the phone. We listen to music while driving or tweet and update statuses on Facebook and Foursquare, checking messages at the stop lights.

Now add to that our work can be stressful. The economy, bottom line concerns, fuel us to utilize all of our waking moments trying to be “more productive”. According to a survey conducted by the American Psychological Association, 41% of the more than 1,700 respondents say they typically feel stressed out on the job.

Workplace stress is not uncommon, but how we deal with it can have a negative impact on mental and physical health, and can cost businesses a lot of money.

So maybe Simon and Garfunkel weren’t so far off, perhaps it is time to slow down and say “Life I love you!” Slowing down is a conscious choice and not always an easy one. It does, however, lead to a greater appreciation for life and a greater level of happiness.

Here are seven quick tips to help you slow down:

1. Do less. It’s hard to slow down when you are trying to do a million things. Instead, make the conscious choice to do less. Ask yourself, is this really necessary? Focus on what’s really important and let go of the rest. Build in time between tasks and appointments, so you can move through your days at a more leisurely pace.

2. Be present. It’s not enough to just slow down — you need to actually be mindful of whatever you’re doing at the moment. So, when you find yourself thinking about something you need to do, or something that’s already happened, or even something that might happen, bring yourself back to the present moment. Observe how happy our pets are, they aren’t worried about tomorrow’s meal, they just want to play with you now. Focus on what’s going on right now. Be aware of your actions, your environment and others around you. This takes practice but is so very worth while.

3. Disconnect. If you carry around a smartphone or other mobile device, shut it off. Better still, learn to leave it behind when possible. If you work on a computer most of the day, have times when you disconnect so you can focus on other things. Being available all the time means we’re subject to interruptions, we’re constantly stressed about information coming in and we are at the mercy of the demands of others.

4. Appreciate nature. Many of us are shut in our homes and offices and cars, buses and trains most of the time, and rarely do we take the opportunity to go outside. Often, even when people are outside, they’re on their cell phones. Instead, take the time to go outside and really observe nature, take a deep breath of fresh air, enjoy the serenity of water and greenery. Exercise and play outdoors when you can. Find outdoor activities to enjoy such as nature walks, kayaking, swimming, etc. Feel the sensations of water and wind and earth against your skin. Try to do this daily — by yourself or with loved ones.

5. Eat slower. Instead of cramming food down our throats as quickly as possible — leading to overeating and a lack of enjoyment of our food — practice eating slowly. Take three deep breathes before beginning a meal or snack. Be mindful of each bite, taking time to appreciate the flavors, aromas and textures. Eating slowly has the double benefit of making you fuller on less food and making the food taste better.

6. Daydream. Let your mind wander. Most of us have been told daydreaming is a bad habit, but research shows that it actually allows us to be more creative. When we reduce stress, our minds are able to access regions of our brain not available when we’re stressed out. So, close your door, turn off anything electronic and close your eyes for five to 10 minutes. Let your mind wander. Who knows, the flashes of insight that come could be your next million dollar idea?

7. Breathe. When you find yourself speeding up and stressing out, pause, and take a deep breath. Take a couple more. Really feel the air coming into your body, and feel the stress going out. By fully focusing on each breath, you bring yourself back to the present, and slow yourself down. Again, notice our pets and how they breathe. Their bellies go up and down, as the air goes in and out of their diaphragms, babies breathe the same way. Try your best to do the same.

If you want to take a moment right now to slow down and relax, visit my website here for the free audio: Serenity

Golden Buddha

Written by: Debbie

This is not original, but something worth sharing:

In 1957, a group of Tibetan monks were informed that a highway was being built and the highway would have to go through the location where the shrine for which they were responsible was currently located. The shrine, a huge clay Buddha, would have to be moved. Arrangements were made and the day of shrine moving arrived. The shrine, located under a roof to keep it safe from the elements, was prepared for its journey. A crane began lifting the clay Buddha. The Buddha, as it rose off of its block resting place, began to crack. IT was far heavier than all the engineers had estimated. The monk supervising the movement of the Buddha frantically called to the crane operator. Telling him to set the Buddha down. Quickly, the alert crane operator carefully set the Buddha on the ground. As the monks and the engineers examined the Buddha, they found several large cracks. A larger crane would be needed. That crane would not be brought in until the next day. The Buddha would have to spent the night in its current location. To make matters worse, there was a storm building and the next would be a stormy one.

The monks covered the Buddha with water proof tarps on poles to keep it dry overnight. All seemed to be well. During the night, the head monk awoke and decided to check on the Buddha. With a flashlight, the monk carefully checked the condition of the Buddha. As he walked around the huge clay figure shining his light on the cracks, something caught his eye. He returned to the spot on which he had just shined his light. He peered into the crack. What he saw he did not understand. He needed to see more. He went back to his quarters, found a chisel and a hammer and returned to the Buddha. He began carefully chipping at the clay around the crack. As the crack widened, he could not believe his eyes. He ran to wake the other monks and instructed each to bring a hammer and chisel. By lantern light the monks carefully chipped all the clay from the Buddha. After hours of chiseling, the monks stepped back and stared in awe at the sight before them. There, in front of the monks, stood a solid gold Buddha.
When the moving crew arrived later that morning to complete the job of moving the Buddha to its new location, there was much confusion and excitement. Where had the clay Buddha gone? From where had the Golden Buddha come? The monks explained. Historians were called and research was begun to discover the origin of the Golden Buddha.
After much research, the pieces of the story were put together. The Golden Buddha was the cherished responsibility of a group of monks several centuries earlier. These monks received word that the Burmese army was headed their way. Concerned that the invading army would loot the shrine for its Golden Buddha, the monks covered their Buddha with 8 to 12 inches of clay. When they were finished the Golden Buddha appeared to be a Buddha of clay. The invading army would surely have no interest. The monks were correct. The invading army had no interest in the Buddha. They did, however, kill all the monks before they moved on. The Golden Buddha was lost in history until 1957.

There is a Golden Buddha inside each of us. Hidden away and covered with layers and layers of clay. We start out life as a true Golden Buddha. Then our true self gets put on a shelf and we get involved in the survival game. We each begin to lose our true drive and we lose sight of the gifts each of has to offer.

The Golden Buddha story gives us tools we can use every day – the flashlight, the chisel and the hammer. The flashlight represents the power of our individual vision. The hammer represents the power of our individual level of responsibility. The hammer represents the power of our individual sense of team that will get each of us on our road to success. The team we each have available to us are those individuals whom we know are committed to us unconditionally – our true friends and family.

Tampa Named Most Stressed-Out City In The U.S.

Written by: Debbie

Tampa made a top 10 list, in fact it made it to the number one spot! But, not a list we like to brag about around here.

Sperling’s BestPlaces, a research firm specializing in livability rankings, has released its new study of major cities with the most and least stress. The study analyzed a variety of factors associated with stress, including suicide, divorce, crime, joblessness and lengthy commuting.
With that in mind, I decided to do my part to help reduce the stress. It may not be the cure, but if it even helps change one attitude, I believe the butterfly effect may begin.

Click Here For Calm

Be sure you have a few minutes to enjoy, uninterrupted. Then please, share with anyone you might know that could use a moment of comfort.

No Strings Attached, Your Fears Untangled

Written by: Debbie

The 5 “A’s” Of Overcoming Fear

Written by: Debbie

Working Women Of Florida hosted a conference on September 5th and 6th at the Mahaffey Theater in St. Petersburg, FL. I was honored to be asked to speak on the subject of fear. Standing on the stage with 400 women present was an awesome experience. (Notice the picture at the top of this page.) The love and energy of this group of women inspired me to keep doing what I love most. I met some pretty amazing ladies, whom I hope to share with for a long time to come.

The presentation included the 5 “A’s” to remember when you desire to overcome fear. Those include:

Acknowledge
Awfulize
Appreciate
Ask (Afform)
Act

Acknowledge your fear and what it really represents for you. Is there a deeper reason for the fear? For instance, I once experienced a fear of driving that was more about a fear of success than it was about driving. Once I acknowledged that, I was ready to let that go and move forward!

Awfulize those dreaded experiences. In other words, take it to the extreme. That can help you realize that things aren’t going to be quite what you imagine. If in fact they are pretty bad, you might be surprised at the tools and skills you have in place for handling the situation.

Appreciate that in the past those feelings have served a purpose. Once you can accept and honor that, it is time to understand that you have outgrown other old behaviors (i.e. thumb sucking for comfort). You no longer need these limiting thoughts and beliefs.

Ask questions that will help you. Rather than continuing to ask questions based in negative programming, begin to ask the questions that a changed you might ask. Instead of asking, “what if this went wrong”, imagine asking, “what if this went right”? (More information on questions that work for you can be found in the works of Noah St. John, originator of Afformations.)

Act on your new beliefs and understandings. To decide you have overcome a fear of elevators is great, to ride in one is real victory. Find someone you trust to support you in taking those first steps and celebrate the new you!

Take steps today to begin creating the life free of fear that you desire. Please, let me know your stories. I’d love to share your successes with others.

DebbieDona